It's October...

I think that the Fall season has always been my favorite... with the months of September, then October, come new beginnings: a new school year (wearing favorite sweaters & boots), autumn gardens of squash & pumpkins, Fall's equinox, the ushering in of The Holidays and thoughts of gift-giving... (need holiday decor & gift ideas? see SweetPea & Violets' Gift Gallery)
Even though I so love and enjoy the season and coming holidays, it is also a time that I, as do many, occasionally deal with bouts of depression. Despite all of the festivities, it is so very common that one often feels overwhelmed with all that "needs to be done" - as well as an engulfing sense of lonliness. Yes, I have my family all around me, and yet I tend to still feel so completely on my own and isolated. The "kids" are all grown up and doing their own things. I often feel left to my own devices (not a bad thing, generally) and without someone special of my own to share the laughter and merriment with. Do I need someone to share these things with? Maybe not... but, it would be so much more... fun... to share it all. Throughout their childhood years, I always gave all I had to make sure my children would have funny memories to recall. The costumes (both made by me and bought upon occasion), the few get-togethers or parties that I actually managed to put together, the school parades and festivities... I did these things on my own, without benefit of a "partner's" assistance, support, participation. Thus, the resultant sadness, the lonliness. These experiences didn't quite live up to my... expectations. You know, those envisioned fantasies of blissful married life. My life, my married life of those years, was far from blissful.
And, yet, I perservered. I kept it up, hoping, hoping... for what, I don't really know. I suppose for what should have been and wasn't.

I have admittedly abandoned that mode of thinking in the past few years. Still deal with the sadness, but know that I do indeed have the power to make it different, make what I envision a reality. Working on that... It is where the aromatherapy and meditation comes in, I suppose. I've learned to deal with emotive responses and control how I react to given circumstances or events with meditative practice and essential oils. It helps, it really does!! Not that I'm perfect - far from it! Still so very much to learn... and I am learning, every single day. I want to share what I learn, the skills developing. I want to give back and help...

That's where my websites come in to play... I've used these websites to fulfill the need to give, to help, to create. They've been my resource, my implement through which I have both gained and made available usable knowledge. At SweetPea and Violets one finds the tools - essential oils, accessories, candles, books, even links to other resources - to utilize in helping oneself, in growing and evolving emotionally, spiritually. At Cottage Craft Creations, SweetPea's sister site, one finds the art and craftwork that, I believe, rounds it all out. After all, healing and creation kind of goes hand-in-hand, doesn't it? And, I do indeed feel the energy buzzing through me when I am creating - whether it's the hands-on of clay sculpting, drawing and painting, writing, or the needles clicking with the making of each new knitted or crocheted hat, scarf, sweater or baby afghan...

That said, I'd like to share a bit of poetry by a favorite unknown writer:

Preparation

What is needed, what is wanted

To purge the meek and save the strong,
what we need is a loving song,
to grab our axes with one hand,
and swing down harder than the land:

The vessel of which will hold our blood,
and the lungs that will help breathe out loud,
the feet that will climb over teeth,
and the warmth that will deny penetration;

the link that will lower into the dark,
the air that will consume our thirst,
the life of fire's wrath,
and the tune of wind's shout;

the extension of man's hand,
laid deep in nothing's mouth,
taken farther with one word,
defied again not by riddle;

tome's of wisdom far begotten,
chests of fear far departed,
logic represented,
never left in solid question;

if none are present with the coming lesson,
we will be undone at the seams,
lest there be another attribute,
of which will be allowed to lead...

This is not what we want...
simply what we need.

- Odin Cult